The Bright Side of Change
January 28, 2018
“Just when I think I have learned the way to live, life changes.” – Hugh Prather
I sit here writing this on an incredible precipice of change. I moved to Brooklyn for the first time (from Manhattan) last Sunday. My roommate has been out of town since before I moved in, so today is our first day together as roommates in our new apartment. Tomorrow I leave for Minneapolis to start a new project at work. As an IT consultant, I’m on a new project every 6 months to years, completing my work and then moving onto the next client that needs my skills. New projects mean new location, new team, new routine.
The funny thing about change is that is it always happening.
Every experience and person we interact with influence our behavior, our perspective, our opinions. It’s inevitable. Change is happening slowly every day, but sometimes it happens all at once in very visible ways. That’s when it gets scary, and emotions get caught up into it. It feels like there is a before and after with nothing in between. It feels like good and bad or comfortable and uncomfortable. In reality, what is making the transition difficult is holding onto the familiarity of what was. We hold onto an idea of the present, instead of seeing the present moment as it is without feeling.
It’s impossible to just sit and meditate through the entire “change.” We live a society that requires us to interact with others and take action. On the work front, the real reason I’m moving to another project this time is because I butted heads with my manager. He never trusted me, and that seriously set me up to fail. It sucked. I’m a pretty easygoing person, so it’s hard to accept that I won’t get along with everyone. It was so hard for me to confront this feeling. I’ve felt like I had the opportunity to succeed, but I didn’t do enough or the right things to steer the sinking ship in the right direction. Maybe I’m not as great as I think I am. Maybe I was never the right person for the role to begin with. The feeling of failure and what-ifs can eat away at us indefinitely, until we let light shine into the dark room.
My light is focusing on the great opportunities that will come out of my next project. By seeing all the possible (positive) outcomes and keeping my spirits uplifted to tackle the future, I move through my life with joy and hope -- while also not forgetting the past and reminding myself how I can improve. Even the act of getting excited about meeting my new team members keeps me from dwelling on the past. Instead of holding onto the seemingly perfect or comfortable past, let go. See the positives in the way forward.
Cheers to all the changes that make us uncomfortable – may we always find the light in every situation. See y’all on the bright side!
“I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” – Jimmy Dean
xx,
Mel
